What a compliment

So tonight, we were all in the living room watching a little Joel Osteen on TV, and he was talking about people being talented. Joei piped in and said, "I'm talented, and I have a lot of friends." Who knew the two went hand in hand, but to a four year old, I guess they do.

Then she proceeded to tell me that I was talented and that daddy was as well. So Joey asked her what she thought he was talented at to which she replied, "preaching!"

Now that was so cute, it really touched Joey's heart, you could totally tell. But then she went on to say one more thing, she said to him, "and you love people."

I just thought that was so neat. She knows that her dad loves people. Of course she threw me a bone and later said that I do too, but that probably was because she saw me tear up. It just blessed me.

I guess you just think that your kids see all your flaws, all the time. Parenting brings out the worst in me sometimes, that's for sure.

Heaven

Joei was putting on a puppet show last night in the infamous box we got the other day; man, give a kid a box and it will occupy them for hours - anyway. A friend of ours sent Lily a gift in that box. It was some outfits, a blanket and 2 of the angels that say the "now I lay me down to sleep" prayer when you push the belly. Joei has taken the angels for herself, which I think one was for her anyway, so no matter. Well she was putting on a puppet show last night and this is the convo that ensued:

Me: Hello angels, what are your names?

Angels: (AKA Joei, although every now and again she can be an angel, but more often than not, I want to call her the opposite!)

The girls name is Selah and the boys name is Travis.

Me: well hello Selah and Travis, where do you live?

Angels: in heaven

Me: Oh so you live with Jesus?

Angels: Yes.

Me: who else do you see in heaven?

Angels: I see Joei's Grandma and your Grandpa.

Ok, she got me there. She did not even skip a beat, did not even have to think about who was there. She instantly said that her Grandma (Joey's mom) and my Grandpa were there. It just touched me. She really does pay attention when we explain these things to her. I did not think she fully comprehended that, since she has never met either of them. I assumed she would not grasp that concept, but in her little 4 year old innocent mind, she gets it. She gets it.

Oh to have that kind of understanding...

Happy Thanksgiving!

I try to be thankful on a regular basis, I know that my life is wonderful and I never want to take it for granted. The little things that I gripe about are so petty in the scheme of things, thank you Lord for your goodness. Thank you for the mercy you bestowed on me. Thank you for calling me your daughter.

I'm thankful for my family; that I have such a great husband and healthy girls. I'm thankful that one of my sisters is here in town. She is so helpful to us, and a great pal. I'm thankful for my friends that are really family...I have quite a few friends in that category. What a blessing!

A few years back, I was talking to my mom about something and I remember her saying to me, " Jen, you have a nice life." Well if you know anything about my childhood, you would know how much she meant that statement. And she is right, I do have a nice life. Thank you Lord.

What are you thankful for?

Come on E, sing it

Isaiah 30:18 has become one of my favorite verses, I wanted to share it here:

" Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you, He rises to show you compassion."

That amazes me. God. The same God that created the world; the same God that breathed life into my mothers womb; the same God that saved me from the destructive path that I was on, that God - He longs to be gracious to me. TO ME. It amazes me. It really does not get any better than that.

No matter what you have done, or have not done. No matter where you are at in life, no matter what you may think of yourself...I have news for you; God longs to be gracious to you...and that's not all; He rises to show you compassion.

God is not up in heaven with a baseball bat ready to knock you upside the head for any wrong you have done. He is not up there saying to the angels "yep, look at what Jen did now. Can't she ever get it together?" No. He longs to be gracious. He wants nothing more than to bestow grace and mercy on our tear stained souls. He is a gracious God. He is a merciful God. So merciful that he sent His only Son to this earth, to become man, to take on the sins of this world, so that He, God, could be gracious to us. Amazing. It really, really does not get any better than that.

And the rival continues

I asked Joei if she wanted Jaden to stay the night (we are watching her Friday night, and it will be past bedtime) and Joei immediately said, "No, I will fight with her over something and then she will want me to get in bed with her and sing her a lullaby." All the while with her arms flailing about in the most dramatic flair possible. Just now, I asked her if if she loved Jaden and she said, "Yessssss," with a rather annoyed tone that I keep asking her that. Ok. Fine. I will never ask you again. I will wait until you are both in high school, and will drop you off in front of the school, where I will proceed to yell to both you and Jaden, "I have pictures of both of you in the tub together...naked." Don't make me do it girls, don't make me do it.

Joei & Jaden. Arch enemies for life. On Sunday, when Joei found out Jaden would not be at church, she was so sad that she would not have Jaden to play with. Rewind to two days earlier and Joei was pushing Jaden into the coffee table. Go figure.

A smile is worth a thousand words

I think I have mentioned before how much I love Lily's smile; it is so sincere. When she smiles, her entire body smiles! I especially love it when I go in her room to get her from a sleep. Her arms and legs flail about as if independent from her chubby little body! She wakes up around 6:30 every morning and I generally can leave her in the crib for a good half hour before I know that she will begin spewing profanities at me for ignoring her. Alas, I go get her. I don't want to be cussed out by a 6 month old. Besides, that's much to early in the morning for such language.

Anyway. I had a thought the other day, (yes, scary when that happens isn't it) it was about the similarities of parenting and God. I have heard so often about God's love toward us being likened to how we love our own kids, but I am seeing it all the more now that I have my own children. Now follow me here, (good luck with that by the way) when Lily wakes up, she just hangs out and talks until I come in there. I try to appease her with the paci every 10 minutes or so; poor thing gets her hopes up that I've come to rescue her but no, I'm just trying to buy a few more minutes of sleep. However, no matter how long I have left her in the crib, when I finally do go in and talk to her, she is beyond thrilled and is smiling like she has just been given a million bucks and a slice of chocolate cake. She is not mad at me, hollering at me for leaving her there for too long. She is not saying to me "hey mom, you should have come the moment you heard me, you took to long to answer me." No. She just hangs out, fully trusting that in a few minutes, mom will hear me. Mom will hear me, and she will answer me...I'm just gonna be patient. And wait.

Following me? It can be hard to follow me, I know. But isn't that what the Lord wants us to do? Just chill out, wait for Him. He will come. He will meet the need. He has not left us or forsaken us. He just operates on His time is all. The Bible tells us that all things work together for the good to those that love God right? Right. So if that's the case, I'm just going to trust God, trust Him that His ways are higher than my ways. The answer to my prayer that I think I need, well, that just may be the wrong answer. Or it might be the right one, however point A has to match up to point B until that answer can be delivered. God has it all in hand. Isn't that amazing? Just chill. Just hang out, wait for God to move. He will. Just like every morning, Lily knows that my face will eventually peek over her crib and her needs will be met. Like Lily, every morning I can rest assured that God will be there, ready to meet my need. And also like Lily, I'm just going to lay there, and talk to myself =)

Pray for our kids!

If you click on this, you will be directed to a wonderful blog that I have recently stumbled upon. The writer has listed scriptures/prayers that we can use to pray for our children. It's really cool that she has taken the time to do that; she has asked that readers spread the word so I wanted to share it with you.

Truth

I have been reading in the book of Proverbs lately...sad to say I have not been in my Bible all that much these days though; life with 2 kids has gotten me off track. I need to find that track though, because I truly sense a difference in myself when I'm in the Word consistently. Anyway, for the past month or so, when I do pick up the Bible, I read proverbs. I saw Joey reading in that book for quite some time so I thought I would peep it out myself.

I don't have a particular scripture that comes to my mind, just this thought: I think it is so cool how the Bible is applicable to our everyday life. It fascinates me really. I can read a particular verse at just the right time in my life, and it will totally change a situation I am in. What is so cool is that someone a hundred years ago very well may have been in a similar situation, read the same verse, and again, something miraculous may have happened for them too.

Well I reckon that's why Hebrews 4 talks about the Word of God being living and active. Alive. It is the only book that when you read it, it reads you. I love that! That is why the same scriptures that folks read wayyyyy back in the day, and that they lived by and were encouraged through, can still do the very same thing for us. It's really quite mind boggling when you think about it.

How cool of God to leave us with the Bible. I take it for granted sometimes. That is, until I pick it up, and read a verse that so points to where I'm at in life...and I'm yet again back in awe of what an amazing God we serve.

All of a sudden

Lily just started reaching some milestones, and it seems like it was out of the blue! All of a sudden she started grabbing toys, and pulling them to her mouth. She began to try to crawl when on her tummy. And my favorite, she grabs her feet. It just seems like it was all overnight she began to change out of a newborn to a baby. And a chunky monkey at that. I took her to the ped yesterday to have her ear looked at and she's up to 17 lbs. So cute. In reality though, she has been working up to these milestones, but to me, it felt like it was suddenly.

All of a sudden. Sometimes things happen like that in our lives too. You will wake up and things have changed and you say to yourself, "when the heck did that happen?" I am not sure if I blogged about my self-esteem issues, maybe I will do that sometime if I have not, anyway...a friend asked me what finally set me free from the terrible self-image I had. It was funny because I could not pin point a specific time where I felt like I was free, I just was. It was an all of a sudden moment for me. I realized that over time, reading the Bible and praying, that I just was set free. I did not have a smack yourself in the head moment where I shouted "I'm healed!" or anything like that. But looking back on that time in life, it feels like it was all of a sudden. Does that even make sense?!

I say that to encourage you to keep pluggin' on in life. If you are walking through a trial in life at the moment, perhaps you see no end in sight, hang tight. Eventually you will be on the other side of the mountain and you will think gosh, that was all of a sudden.

What's in a name?

Jen the hen from Ivers Glen. That was what my Grandpa used to call me. He (the Grandpa who inspired the name for this blog) had nick-names for all us grandkids. Let's see: Joe the schmoe from Kokomo. Jen the hen from Ivers Glen. Jess the mess from something something dess (can't remember, sorry Jess!) and Jackie wacky from Kowasaki. So there ya go. Except for Jess. Poor middle child!

I find myself giving my kids all sorts of names. Joei is often called Bear, Kate, Jo-bear, Tuggy, Punkin butt, and the list goes on. Lily has become the Putter, Putty, Put put, Lily Picadilly, Muncher...and again, the list goes on. Nicknames are funny things. I wonder what will stick for my kids, and I wonder what other names they will aquire as they age. It's fun. If you know my husband, you know he has a nickname for everyone so why should our kids be any different?!

Psalm 66:2 says, "Sing out the honor of His name; Make His praise glorious." Names mean something. They reflect our character, our nature. God has many names:

Jehovah Jireh, means that God is our provider. Jehovah Nissi, meaning that God reigns. Jehovah Shammah, the Lord is with you. And yep, you guessed it, the list goes on.

When you are facing something overwhelming, call on the name of the Lord. Do you need the floodgates of Heaven to open up on your finances? Call on the name of the Lord. Is your health failing? Call on the name of the Lord. Do you need direction in life? Call on the name of the Lord. There is power in His name. Speak out His many names and not only will it build your faith, but it releases that faith to go out and fight for you!!

Praise the name of the Lord!

Seasons

I love Crepe Myrtle trees. This time of year, they are in full bloom! There seem to be tons of them around here, and I honestly smile when I see them. Call me dorky, but I love the bright and vibrant colors they exude! I like flowers in general though, they just make me smile, what can I say I'm easy to please!

Yesterday I was driving down a street that is heavy with Crepe Myrtles and I began to notice that they are losing some of their vibrancy. The colors are beginning to fade, the blooms are starting to fall, they are changing. Something inside me kinda sank a tad, I was bummed that the trees are going back to being their plain old boring selves. Just as quickly as that twinge of sadness hit me, a thought came to me that pushed that feeling away. Seasons change. I know what you are thinking, "duh Jen, really? You think we don't know that seasons change?" No, of course I know you are smarter than that (all 2 of you that read this!) however it just struck such a chord in me that I had to blog it. (Remember, I'm simple!)

It's ok when certain things in life begin to lose their vibrancy. It's alright when you find that what used to excite you (job, friendships, hobbies, etc)no longer fills you with that feeling. Perhaps the love you had for a specific job or task is beginning to fade. Could it be that your season is simply changing? The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 3:1 that, "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under Heaven." Seasons change. Life changes. People change.

Change is not always welcome. Sometimes we don't like winter due to the rains. Then we have Spring and with that comes allergies. On to Summer and the heat is the complaint of everyone. Then we have fall. And well, we don't really complain to much about fall now do we? There is something exciting about fall, the leaves begin to change color, they fall off the trees in preparation for the winter ahead. Hmmm. Change may not always be welcome in life, but the seasons, well now that is one thing that we have no choice but too welcome.

So if you feel like you are in the midst of something bleak, perhaps the thunder of excitement has left you and your particular task, take heart in the fact that it simply could be fall for you. The leaves are changing. The flowers are failing. But it's ok...because the author of the Seasons does not change, nor does He fail. He will guide you through whatever season in life you are in, and whatever season of life you are about to embark on. Seasons do change, but in the meantime, lets stop and smell the flowers...kinda like Joei!

Sleep hates me

Sleep really must hate me. I must have ticked her off somewhere in my past, for she does not grace my presence much these days. Ah sleep, where have you gone?

Oh wait, I have a 6 week old. Never mind. Clearly lady sleep is far too afraid to get mixed up with a newborn. She must know the perils of the goings on that come with a little babe. Sigh. I'm tired. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh.

Whatever right. So what if I have bags under my eyes that would put a ghost to shame. Who cares that my roots are about a foot long. And today's date is what again? Oh really...already in June huh. Who knew.

But all in all I have a sweet little baby, and she is sweet let me tell ya. She really is a good baby. We just need to figure out the whole sleep thing and we will be good to go.

Well that's it for now. Must.Get.Coffee.

Lily Rae is here!

Well, she has been here for 6 weeks...isn't that good enough reason for my delay in posting?! 6 weeks of figuring out a newborn and wrangling a near 4 year old will certainly put the old blogging on the back-burner!

But she is here, and she is wonderful. I will post more later, as she is beckoning me from the other room!

Lily Rae, born May 7th, 2008

8 pounds 11 ounces

20 3/4 inches

The Fantastic Four

I'm scheduled to give birth at 11:00 in the morning, tomorrow. I cannot fully seem to wrap my head around it though, as if it's not really happening. Sure, for 9 months I have carried this baby around inside, doing my best to nurture her to full term...and now that the day is here for her to officially join our family, I cannot seem to find words to express what I feel.

I look forward to meeting her; what will she look like? What will she weigh? What is her personality going to be? What will she become one day? The usual stuff races through my head.

Yes, I cannot wait to meet her, and get to know her, but I can't help but feel a little sad at the same time. I'm really struggling to word this right, like I said, I can't express it.

I guess it all comes down to this: tomorrow morning, Lisa will show up, we will leave for the hospital, and I will say goodbye to my one and only daughter, the one whom I have grown to love so much more than the day I first met her. I could never imagine this kind of love, no matter how many people tried to prepare me for it. It has been just Joei, her dad and me, against the world for close to four years...how do you transition to a family of four? How do you allow a new person into your already well-formed clique?

I have heard people say the same thing, wondering how you have enough love to go around....and they all agree, that you just do. But in this moment, in the right now, I can't see how that happens. All I can think of is my little tubby in her bed, sacked out like a light, waiting for morning to hit so she can run in our room and be the center of attention for the entire day and night! I have so enjoyed hanging out with Joei on our own for the time we have had.

Tomorrow is a new day though, a new dawn for our family. We will no longer be a family of three, will be four. Joei is thrilled to bits to meet her new sister, and I am equally as thrilled, if not more so, to see Joei's face. She already loves this baby and it's not even out yet! And you know something, I do too.

I love this baby. And I look forward to falling further in love with her as I get to know her. I don't know why God sees fit to bless me with another child, but for whatever reason, I'm thankful. I will do my best to make it all work...that both my kids would feel loved and cherished all the days of their lives. Will I blow it? Yes. But my prayer is and will always be that they will know mama loves them...

So while I feel like I am mourning the end of an era, so to speak, I look forward to embracing another little life; a new family member. We will truly be the fantastic four!

My top 10

Top 5 things I love about being pregnant and the top 5 things I loathe about the whole ordeal; in no particular order!

Loathe:

5 - Watching the scale creep. Along the same lines, the nurse weighs you on one of those lame scales, with the weight on it...why was one nurse so darn quick to jump to the 200 huh? C'mon. At least humor me. But then I had another nurse put that weight on the 150 and I thought ok, don't patronize me. We all know I've packed it on here.

4 - The "sisters" look like objects from another world.

3 - Shaving anything on your body resembles some sort of circus act.

2 - Sleeping. It's just not easy on any level. You turn right, you feel like a turtle. You turn left, you feel like a beached whale. Basically you have become some sort of animal with a child attached to your innards.

1 - The comments. Oh the comments. And the dumbest ones tend to be from men. "Oh did you know you have something growing on you?" Hmmm, no, I hadn't noticed, thanks. Or my favorite yet, "and here I thought you were just putting on weight?" Really? Seriously? Someone let you out of the house with that kind of stupidity flowing through your veins? Ok, ok, I digress.
Must.control.hormones.

Love:

5 - Feeling the baby move for the first time & along the same lines, hearing the heartbeat.

4 - Not having to suck in my stomach.

3 - The joy of ordering something ever so fattening at a restaurant and not feeling like I have to explain myself, or justify the splurge because hello, "there clearly is something growing on me!"

2 - The way my daughter kisses my belly and talks to her sister, it melts me every time.

1 - Honored. I'm honored that for whatever reason, God thinks I can handle this.

Maternal Ramblings

Beware, this is a post from a woman about to birth a child in a week...I cannot be held responsible for any crazy talk!

I took Joei to the park across the street today, just to get her some exercise, and basically because I can just sit there like the beached whale I've become. Well, I really just enjoyed watching her interact with the other kids today. She is a real compassionate kid, real friendly as well. I just sat there with such pride over the little person she is becoming! Call me biased, but she really is a neat kid. I love the qualities she has and the character she seems to be developing.

I have been hit before with the reality of what it is to parent a child, but today it was in a different realm. I feel like I am truly embracing my calling at this time, and that is to be a mom. I honestly want nothing more right now, than to raise my kids, to watch how they grow, and to pray that I can leave them with something more than just my chin. (Yes folks, that is really all Joei has of mine, oh and bless her heart I think she has my feet.)

Inheritance. It is my job as a parent to impart anything I have learned, any gifting I have been given, anything I am, to my children. What good is life experience if its not shared? What good is a gift if it is not given away? I want to leave my children with an inheritance, and I don't mean monetary...granted I hope that is there for them as well, but there is so much more than that. I can only pray that my life is an example to my kids, that they would want to be like me. Not that I am anything, by an stretch, but rather, they would see the nothing in me, and know that God takes that nothing, and he does something with it. Auh now how is that for a run-on sentence. Again, I plead pregnant.

I don't know what came over me today at the park, but I honestly feel a fresh wind has come over me. And perhaps not a moment too soon. In a matter of 10 days I will have a newborn baby. That thought has freaked me out for awhile now but I can honestly say that I think things are gonna be alright! I think we just might make it after all. And I hope, and I pray, that one day my children will feel the exact same way that I do right now. Not necessarily that they have kids of their own, though I would love that of course, but that they would fulfill whatever dreams God gives them in life. And they would know that no matter what comes their way, God will always help them to achieve those dreams. Because at the end of the day, they can look at their mama, and they will know that God took a nothing, and He did something...

The stuff dreams are made of

So, in case you were wondering if indeed I am pregnant, perhaps my afternoon snack is proof that I am telling the truth, (pay no attention to the banana's in the corner, they mean nothing!)

His eye is on the sparrow

I heard this song in church the other day, and man did it bring back memories. I wish I could find the original artist, or at least the person I remember singing it, but this does the trick. Just take a minute to listen to the words, and to reflect on all the times that God not only took care of the sparrow, but the times that He took care of you as well!

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Faith of a mustard seed

The faith of children never ceases to amaze me. Last night, Extreme Makeover Home Edition was airing a re-run episode about a little 8 year old girl battling cancer, and Joei happened to glance up at the TV. She asked why the little girl had no hair, so we talked about her being sick with cancer, and then we prayed for her. Well this morning she woke up, came into the living room and asked me if the little girl had gotten better. Joei has this amazing faith, that the moment she prays, well heck, it's done. Imagine that. Anytime she prays for me to feel better, or anyone else for that matter, she assumes it's all good. If I complain again about something she will remind me that "mama we already prayed!"

Yes Joei, yes we did. Why can't we be that way? After all, that is how the Bible tells us to live right? Say the prayer, and trust that God will answer it in the way that will best suit our path.

In the instance of that sweet girl named Boey on Extreme Makeover, they said that she had lost her battle with cancer this last December. I cannot imagine the grief of her parents, I'm sure there are no words for it. But that little 8 year old girl left a mark bigger than alot of "grown" people ever will, what an amazing legacy she leaves. She had said on the show that she prays alot because it helps her; she prays for her healing. Well, she is fully healed now. That is what is so amazing about prayer. We don't know how it will turn out. It may not turn out the way we expect or want it to. But that is where the faith of a child is so powerful, and if we can but grasp just a tiny portion of that, we can leave all our anxiety at the door.

Matthew 19:14 says, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these."

Matthew 17:20-21 says, ... "I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. "

I just can't resist posting this picture!